Ho-Hos and Hookers

Jun 01

(Source: disneymagix, via waltdisneyismyhero)

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False Alarm of the Day: In light of an explosion of news stories about cannibalism over the past week, the Centers for Disease Control have issued a statement reassuring us that zombies are not real, and we can go about our business without fear of a zombie apocalypse. People eating each other’s body parts due to the effects of synthetic drugs, on the other hand …

The CDC told the Huffington Post that “CDC does not know of a virus or condition that would reanimate the dead (or one that would present zombie-like symptoms).”

Well, that’s reassuring, coming from the same agency that has a detailed webpage about zombie apocalypse preparedness.

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in my bunker.

[gawker]

(via onasteelhorseiride)

(Source: celestialmama, via theothersydney)

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(Source: carrryonkeepcalm, via runawaysky)

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mudwerks:

laughingsquid:

Cucumber Killer Whale

[gah!…]

“On our first date, I treated her to the finest ice cream Baskin-Robins had to offer, our dinner table doubling as the curb. I kissed her, and it tasted like chocolate.” — President Barack Obama on his first date with wife First Lady Michelle Obama (via paintedoncanvas)

(via englishlaundry)

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(Source: larmoyante, via salazar-slytherin)